Confessions of a Childhood Dork

In the ’80’s, when I was growing up, you had posters of Lamborghinis or Tiffany or Bon Jovi or Poison (especially if your name is Amy on this one) on the walls of your bedroom. You did, didn’t you?

Not me, my Innanet friend. I had a thing – rather, I should say “had and continue to have a thing” – with highly informative posters on a variety of topics. Most of my childhood wall posters were National Geographic posters/maps. I had a large map of the world, a poster mapping out the discovered levels of Oak Island’s money pit, and, my personal favorite for years and years: a National Geographic map of the known universe that put things into perspective by starting with the immediate solar system and showing how that fit into the Milky Way and how that fit into the cluster of immediate galaxies that the Milky Way is a part of and so on for billions and billions of light years. Oh, and I guess I did have the occasional legitimate poster of kittens playing on books that was purchased through the Scholastic book fair. One of the only “normal” posters I remember having was on the back of my door: George Brett in mid-swing. I don’t really remember following the Royals, George Brett’s career, or baseball in general back then and I suspect it’s possible that my parents gave me that poster to help balance out what they saw as a clear leaning toward dorkdom. I imagine their hushed conversation, while retiring one night, went something like this:

“Carol, I’m a bit concerned about all the maps in Jeffery’s room.”
“Yeah, what the hell is with that?”
“On your way home tomorrow, I think you should stop at the store and pick up a poster of some baseball player.”
“Well, who should I get?”
“I don’t know. How about that George Brett? I hear he’s good.”

Anyway, I still have a thing for loads of information that is condensed into poster or nugget-like form. That explains my enjoyment of this. I’m also serious when I tell you, anonymous Innanet reader, that you could make me happy by dropping $4.25 on this for me. The question is: Who doesn’t want a wall poster that completely maps out the US Radio Frequency spectrum?

No, really, the question I have for you, reader, is this: Wouldn’t you love to see an episode of “Trading Spaces” where they completely wall panel someone’s room and put up posters of kittens? I think they should have a week where they act like the regular show but they call it “Trading Spaces (Just Kidding).” Imagine the terrified looks upon seeing one’s master bedroom converted to a Strawberry Shortcake theme.