Minorthird’s Copycat Monday Quarter-in-the-Jukebox

I’m following the US Open and you know, I think I heard somewhere that Ekaterina Bychkova is really mean. Like, really kind of cranky and moody and full of complaints and whining all the time and just generally not a nice young woman. There’s got to be a concise word for it but it escapes me at the moment.

Minorthird’s Copycat Monday Quarter-in-the-Jukebox and I’m feeling ’80’s lately for another week.

The packages of Canna lilies that I planted in front of the house this spring, said that they would be blooming in August and would be 3 to 4 feet tall. Here it is mid-August and they are about 1 foot tall and not looking like they’re going to be making the effort. I hate the lazy plants and their “I’ll grow however the hell I please” attitudes.

Cross plant bulbs off, below my haircuts, on the ever growing list of things I’m not going to entrust to Walmart’s hands anymore.

The thing about these two-year-olds is that it’s like you’ve got your very own personal cheering section following you around all the time.

I walk down the stairs and it’s “You go down the stairs? Yaaaaaay Daddy!”
I drink a glass of water and it’s “You drink the water? Yaaaaaay Daddy!”
I back the car out of the garage in the morning and it’s “You back the car? Yaaaaaay Daddy!”

You get the idea. I’m kind of getting used to it now though. I think it would be a good idea to have the same sort of thing on the job. Companies that have daycare options have good employee retention as it is but then, the company could harness the youthful exuberance of the kids in daycare by turning them loose in row after row of cubicles after nap time every day:

“You typing? Yaaaaaay you!”
“You make markety report? Yaaaaaay you!”
“You program Web application? Yaaaaaay you!”

My sister had her first baby this evening. A month and a half earlier than expected but she had an issue this afternoon, went in, did the whole natural birth thing in an hour and Voila! Impressive. Birth experiences are like snowflakes, I’m finding.

I’ve been teaching workshops in the use of this Dreamweaver this week but I’ve had this Dreamweaver on my mind the whole time.

I was going to start each class with it playing while people were still walking in but I decided that might be a little too groan-worthy.

You know how when you text someone, you’re supposed to use all those shortcuts like “U” for “you” and the like? Whenever people do that, I inevitably end up with Sinead singing “Nothing Compares 2 U” in my head.

I can’t really bring myself to do that stuff though. With my English degree, I end up just spelling everything out completely and I’m talking vocabulary words here. I’ve used the word “perchance” in a text message before.

I tend to be a frugal guy. As such, I tend to approach a lot of situations and products in terms of getting the best value for my dollar - at least when I’m by myself.

Buffet? Eat ’til I’m regretful.
Out of shampoo? Turn the bottle upside down.
And texting? I usually try to fill the quota of characters. It pains me ever so slightly to send only a few words.

I was browsing Metafilter and discovered the Canadian Heraldic Authority which includes their Online Register of Arms, Flags, and Badges. You need to check it out and see all the cool coats of arms that have been created for people and organizations.

Of course, like most anyone who isn’t part of the exclusive club, I wish I had a coat of arms. I was poking around to confirm the obvious - there is no Druzba coat of arms - when I came across this: Make Your Own Coat Of Arms! A free Windows software program to make a coat of arms! Hell yeah!

So I haven’t downloaded it and checked it out yet because I’m on a Mac at the moment but please please please be as wonderfully life-changing as I want it to be. Pretty please?

Check out the information page and the directions. I am so doing this with the daughter even though it is a bit above her age at the moment. The site has other projects for kids including a Mega Maps program that looks fun to use if it is everything it says it is.

Anyway, I was thinking of how the Druzba coat of arms would look. For sure, there would be a block of cheese on there, maybe a Tom Tom Club or Echo and the Bunnymen CD jacket… I’ll have to sleep on that.

The thing about those Paint-Your-Own-Pottery places is that, sure, it’s terribly romantic to go and paint a bowl together and put both your names, various hearts, singing birds, rainbows, and such on it. But then, when you get a divorce, what the hell do you do with it? It almost misses the “Who would buy that?” cut as a garage sale item but maybe someone would buy it for a quarter simply for it’s bowl-ness and not the paint upon it.

That would be a unique collection I could get behind though. Imagine a whole dinnerware set of Paint-Your-Own-Pottery from relationships gone south that was pieced together from yard and rummage sales.

Ooooh, maybe I’ll have “Greek night” at home and make gyros and lamb kabobs and do a little twirling dance and toss it, in the joyous Greek tradition, at my own feet.